Sometimes it's just like that. There are those days when your best just doesn't seem good enough. When it rains it pours kind of days. They strike you out of the blue. It's the complete randomness that makes it so potent. A sale or two may be canceled. Your vehicle breaks down. You forgot your significant others birthday...or worse your anniversary. Yikes.
Still got to get through the day though.
This morning I had a dream about my dear mom who departed this world a few years ago. So real it was. Made me miss her a great deal and that pretty much set the tone for how my morning was going to go. And then I found out that a few sales I made last week weren't going to pan out. Great huh?
But...
That's okay. Nobody but a prozac patient is happy all the time. It's okay to own the negative feelings that we all have. I recognized them and eventually made my way through them. I tuned into a few good videos that I found on the IQ Morning Report...I don't always have the luxury to tune in to the IQ Morning Report in the morning! It's a great pick me up any time of the day actually. That began to turn my day around. See I get that just because I start my day off crappy doesn't mean I have to end my day in a crappy manner. And that's my message for the day. Short and sweet. Like my wife. Who always makes me happy.
Until next time...
#YouMatterTremendously
#GoldenRuleLifeStrategy
Today's video: Here's a fella who gets it. What a powerful life philosophy he adheres to.
"Nothing in this world can take the place of persistence. Talent will not: Nothing is more common than unsuccessful men with talent. Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost a proverb. Education will not: the world is full of educated derelicts. Persistence and determination alone are omnipotent."...Calvin Coolidge "Patience, persistence and perspiration make an unbeatable combination for success."...Napoleon Hill Persistence succeeds where nothing else can. I'll swear by this statement. We all have seen it time and time again. That little boy who was average at best when they began a sport...but who persisted until they were a force to be reckoned with. The little girl who was told she would never be good enough at singing who went on to become a platinum selling artist. The business person or inventor who was told their vision was "crazy" or unobtainable who summarily discounted those opinions to achieve enormous success. We're all very familiar with these types of stories. I read a great meme the other day. It said: "Tired of starting over? Quit giving up." Man...how true is that? I know there are at least 500,000 things that I could have mastered had I stayed with them. Okay maybe 10...but you get the point. And we all know this beyond a shadow of a doubt. All of us have at some time or another persisted in something till we got what we wanted or achieved a goal. And the payoff that comes with doing such is incredible. The emotional payoff is what I'm talking about here. There's very little that compares to the feeling of taking on something that others say you can't or won't achieve...and then achieving it. It's like BAM!Perhaps we all need to remember those victories when we are encountered by the obstacles and setbacks that too often derail us. It's important to stay motivated. Things go wrong. Mistakes are going to be made. We just can't let these things crush our souls. Every mistake IS truly a stepping stone for another opportunity. There is, undoubtedly, a lesson...a takeaway from every experience we go through in life. Some of the strongest and wisest people I've ever known or encountered went through unbelievable adversity. Some of their stories were heart wrenching. The types of things you couldn't image experiencing. But they came through demonstrating remarkable resiliency and persistence. Persistence. That's what it takes to achieve anything worthwhile. Here's the formula: Persistence + Persistence + Persistence + Persistence + Persistence + Persistence + Persistence + Persistence + Persistence + Persistence = SUCCESS! Until next time: #YouMatterTremendously #GoldenRuleLifeStrategy Here's today's video:
"Fathers Day is hopefully a time when the culture says, 'This is our moment to look at who our men and boys are.'"...Michael Gurian
Today is Sunday June 19th, 2016. It's Father's Day, and it's also the day that Game 7 of the NBA Finals will be played between the Cleveland Cavaliers and the Golden State Warriors. Game 7 of course means that it's for all the marbles. A championship is at stake, and here in Cleveland where we haven't had a major sports championship since the Cleveland Browns won a football championship in 1964, it's a big deal. This Father's Day is something special.
Father's Day is always a day of mixed emotions for me. My dad had a lot of issues stemming from his military service, and we never got along. I'm sure he loved me, but never knew how to express it, and that was tough on me growing up. To be honest with you it's still tough on me...but more so now because I am now a father of two boys myself. That provides me with the other side of the coin. I'm very close with my sons in all regards. We have a very different father and son dynamic that what I shared with my father. I am very thankful for that.
It's tough being a father at times. You have to constantly walk a fine line between being a disciplinarian and a friend. Trying to set an example for your children requires you to wear many hats. The hat of the husband is worn when you are teaching your sons how to treat their future girlfriends and wife...by how you treat your wife...while teaching your daughters how their future boyfriends and husband should treat them. The hat of the coach is worn when teaching your children how to compete...how to give something their very best and be gracious in victory and how to handle the disappointment when they come up short. The hat of a judge is worn when you ultimately have to make tough decisions and hand out consequences so your children learn valuable life lessons that they can hopefully take with them when they are young adults.
That being said I wouldn't have it any other way. Nick & Kevin I love you guys more than words can express. It's an honor to be your father. You guys are my biggest source of pride. Watching you guys develop into fine young men is my greatest accomplishment, and that's my biggest take away from the whole dad experience. I hope when it's all said and done that you know that I tried my very best and that there's nothing I wouldn't have done for you.
Now how great would it be to cap off this Father's Day by watching the greatest basketball player in the world, LeBron James, deliver a NBA Championship here to Cleveland while I watched and rooted him on with my sons?
Happy Father's Day to everybody out there! GO CAVS!!!
"I only regret that I have but one life to lose for my country."...Nathan Hale
"Memorial Day isn't just about honoring veterans. it's honoring those who lost their lives. Veterans had the fortune of coming home. For us, that's a reminder of when we come home we still have a responsibility to serve. It's a continuation of service that honors our country and those who fell defending it."...Pete Hegseth
"My fellow Americans, ask not what your country can do for you, ask what you can do for your country."...John F. Kennedy
They are America's best. And without a doubt it is with deep and profound appreciation and respect that we should honor the most courageous segment of our society on Memorial Day...the brave men and women who paid the ultimate price for us to savor the liberties that we so thoroughly enjoy on a daily basis.
Courage and valor. Honor and dignity. Strength and pride. There aren't enough words to describe how I feel about the people who donned an American military uniform to serve and protect our country since winning our independence from England.
I really wish I had of served. I admit that is a true regret of mine. It's not based on trying to prove that I was as brave as the next man...nothing misplaced like that at all. It's more about recognizing that I had some misplaced priorities when I was younger, and that my revised life philosophy necessitates that we are all here to serve. We are here to serve our family, our local community, and our great nation.
There is huge dissatisfaction, and a seemingly unbridgeable divide in the way us United States citizens view our own country. We have people who just can't grasp the significance of what we contribute globally to the ideas of freedom and democracy. They want to set Old Glory on fire, or lay her flat upon the ground and tread on her as if she is a useless rag. They do not understand the complete sacrifice that so many have paid in order to keep her waving proudly in the wind. All gave some...some gave all!
I am not saying that our government is perfect. But really...can you imagine another country doing a better job than we do in trying to prevent the rogue nations of the world from encroaching upon their hapless neighbors if not for having the full support of the United States and our armed services?
Truly we all owe a huge dept of gratitude to our nations veterans, and an even greater debt to the families of those who lost a veteran while serving their country. If there ever was a true and valid need for an entitlement program, then that is it. I am talking over and beyond anything available and offered so far.
I know many who will read this post have a family member...or perhaps several...who served our country and didn't make it back. It is not lost on me the pain and anguish you had/have to deal with. But it is with great sincerity that I say to you that...in this guys eyes...they are heroes of epic proportion. And that I am extremely grateful to them. Every last one regardless of ethnicity, race or gender. They represent...quite simply...the very best that America in all her splendor has had to offer. God bless our U.S military personnel and God Bless America.
"The invariable mark of wisdom is to see the miraculous in the common."...Ralph Waldo Emerson
I posted this on my Facebook page but it really bears sharing to the entire world: "Of all the things someone could wish for you...health and happiness are BY FAR the greatest. Life is too short to fret upon most of the things we WORRY about...most of which never COME about.
We can't let the years, the chances, & important opportunities pass us by...thinking mistakenly that happiness is somewhere in the future...a destination to arrive at. Happiness is HERE! It's in the NOW! It's hearing your children's laughter. It's spending time with your family and the friends who mean the world to you. It's doing activities that you've enjoyed since you were a kid. It's the greatest gift you can...and should...give yourself. We have to be present to appreciate the moments that would otherwise elude us."
This, choosing to live in the present, IS something we have a choice in doing. I know too many people who stay firmly entrenched in the past, feeling guilty about transgressions and mistakes they made in an earlier chapter of their lives. Blaming themselves for things that occurred and that they can never go back and change. That type of emotional baggage is just too much to carry around. It serves no purpose except to weigh you down. You cannot change the past. Let it go.
Constantly worrying about the future is the ugly twin sister of living in the past. It creates needless anxiety. It robs you of the sights and sounds of the here and now that you can get pleasure from. People all to often fall into the "what if" trap. "What if this happens? What if that happens?" Running a million scenarios through their heads that usually never take place...and if they do it's usually not as bad as they thought it would be.
Happiness is such an important part of our emotional well being. I know that the entire field of psychology has opened up to the model of studying happy and well adjusted people, not just the people who have behavioral and emotional problems to deal with. I really think that's a step in the right direction. Let's become students of successful, happy people also to see what we can learn from them in order to better help people with true clinical depression. We have to know and understand both sides of the spectrum...and everything in the middle. Kudos to the modern day practitioners in the mental health field.
I am admittedly not a mental health expert. But I have enough life experience behind me to know that unconditional love, acceptance, hope, faith, perspective, gratitude, and choice all are factors which play a role in how happy one can be. And it's helped me to examine my own thoughts and utilize the advice of many who suggest trying to get the most out of life by focusing on the here and now. There are wondrous things surrounding us each and every day. We have to tune into the present to derive the most out of life. Tomorrow is simply not guaranteed. Plan and work for an awesome future, but enjoy the journey. Reflect on the past...but don't obsess about things you are unable to change.
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change...the courage to change the things I can...and the wisdom to know the difference.
"It is only in adventure that some people succeed in knowing themselves-in finding themselves."...Andre Gide
I'm just a few short months from turning fifty. The "Big Five O". And I would be less than honest if I said there wasn't a certain amount of apprehension associated with turning fifty. I don't know if it's simply because I'll be qualified for the AARP or what. All I know is turning forty didn't phase me in the slightest. But fifty will start you thinking. After all, this isn't a practice run.
Perhaps it's because when I was much younger I thought I'd have a lot more things accomplished than what I have thus far. I mean at one point I wanted to be President. That was in second through fourth grade. And at a different point I wanted to be the lead singer of a rock band. That was probably 6th through 9th grade if my memory serves me right. See you know you're getting up there when you start saying "if my memory serves me right".
All I know for sure is that no matter who we are, we all at some point are going to have to face our own mortality. With both of my parents having passed away...as well as many of my other older relatives...I guess fifty is as good a point in my life as any to think about how I want the remainder of my life to play out. Which I'll certainly do. After all, with the miracles of modern science and the breakthroughs in the field of medicine being what they are, perhaps I'll be able to reach that glorified centurian status!
It's really important for us all to live for the experience. "The experience of what" you might ask? The experience of everything that can cross your mind and that isn't in conflict with your value system or harmful to anybody else. There is so much to experience in this remarkable world that surrounds us. I had a sociology professor who once said something that I've never forgotten. He said "there are over 2,000 ways to be human." Thank you Dr. Krebs. Being a kid raised for the most part in suburban Cleveland that struck home with me. It fascinated me. The fact that us humans can...and do...live in every type of environment, and that our cultures can differ so tremendously is just amazing to me. I know that travel is definitely going to be a big part of my bucket list.
Life is short. We should all strive to live the life of a brave explorer or adventurer. Without a doubt life should be fun and exciting and we should wake up each and every morning with some type of compelling reason to attack our day. And while we may not have the ideal job or circumstances to do Indiana Jones type things at this present moment, just the goal of being able to in our future should give us all the incentive we need to work hard to design the life we want. Are there going to be setbacks along the way?Bumps in the road? Heartache? Bumps and bruises? Yep. You can count on that. But never despair that they are things that you can't overcome. Without question you can...and will. And then you're back trying to live for the experiences that uniquely challenge and satisfy you!
Perhaps life after fifty won't be so bad after all. With the right attitude it could be the best years yet! Wow. Now I'm looking forward to it. It's all a matter of perspective, isn't it?
"Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light."...Helen Keller
Humans are social beings. We always have been and we always will be. We thrive on interacting with each other; indeed our very survival as a species has been dependent upon this fact. Our social groups are how we identify and relate to each other. Outside of the family that we are born into, our friends play a pivotal role throughout the course of our lives, and have much to do with how we perceive and experience life.
I have a few life long friends. One of these fellows is Mike Mennozi. I've known Mike ever since kindergarten. When you're 49 years old and you've had a friend since you were 5 years old...well...that's special. People who have known you for your entire life know you in an entirely different way than somebody whose only known you for the past couple years.
That is not to say that Mike and I talk every single day...or that we have weekly visits. We do see each other a few times a year still and make sure that we have a good conversation whenever one of us picks up the phone to call the other. The conversation flows naturally, laughs ensue, and that is enough to sustain our deep rooted friendship. I think all who have these types of long standing friendships should consider themselves fortunate.
Throughout the course of our lives, through shared experiences like school, college, the military, careers, etc...we meet people and bond with those who we have the most in comon with, who we find interesting, and who we admire and respect. We should all "keep on the lookout", so to speak, for good quality people who we can develop friendships with. One of my good friends, Jimmy Fields, is a terrific guy I met through both of our son's participation in the sport of wrestling. At this point, because of our son's involvement in wrestling, we talk and see each other much more than my friendship with my childhood friend Mike, but that's not saying that one is more important than the other. All friendships have their unique properties, and they do not have to parallel or be in competition with each other.
And then there is my best friend...my wife Pam. Lucky are us men who would otherwise be set adrift to the currents of life if not achored down by the sensibilities of a good woman! She is the greatest gift ever bestowed upon me and gave me two wonderful sons to focus my life's energies on...two equally great gifts who are sure to be my running mates in just a few more years. One can hope!
In this day and age of Facebook and other social media friendships, when a persons "friends list" can number in the thousands, it is important to recognize, cultivate, and value the different types of friendships that we have. Friendship can be the best therapy in the world for someone who is down in the dumps. Friendships can encourage us to see the potentialities within ourselves that may be difficult, for whatever reason, for us to recognize.
Friendship truly is a wonderful gift and the following advice are things that I have both heard throughout my life and have found to be truth:
Pick your friends carefully. You are judged by the company you keep.
"Wishing to be friends is quick work, but true friendship is a slow ripening fruit."...Aristotle
I'm an early bird. I've been that way all my life, except for those die hard party years of my early twenties that took me well into the wee hours of the morning...mostly on the weekends. Those years I pretty much partied like a rock star. Misdirected, I thought that was what life was about...sex, drugs, and rock and roll...which means I would eventually stumble into my room, wherever I was living, and sleep until at least noon...if I had the day off. There were plenty of days when I did indeed have to work on a Saturday, and well, those days were pretty rough to get through. Other than that stretch of time I've always woke up early. Just the way I'm biologically wired I guess.
I love waking up and watching the day unfold. No matter the season, the one factor that almost always makes me feel great is when the sun makes it's appearance, announcing that it's a new day to planet Earth. It's no wonder many of our early civilizations had religions that centered around sun worship! When the sun is shining we are renewed in some way. It just makes you feel great.
A bit of wisdom I ran across recently, which was made available through the always enthusiastic Darren Hardy in his newsletter, is that the sun is always shining, you just have to get above the clouds that may be blocking it's rays from reaching us. He relayed a story about how he was leaving a business trip in Seattle; the weather was kind of overcast and gloomy, but soon after departure the plane's elevation was high enough that it was above the clouds and the sunlight was beautifully visible!
I thought it was a terrific analogy to symbolize the choice we can make on how we begin and spend our days. No matter what is occurring in our lives, the irritations, the unpleasant people, the depressing local news stories, all those clouds so to speak...we can choose to rise up above them in the same way that a plane does to reach the sunshine. The sun is shining today here in Cleveland Ohio...but in all actuality it's shining everyday above the clouds!
You do not have to let the weather, or nearly anything else dictate your moods. Of course certain life events are sad. The death of a loved one for instance, or the loss of a job. Those are times when it's reasonable to feel depressed, angry, and all the other human emotions that accompany life events of that magnitude. But to live each and every day in a funk is not healthy, nor is it acceptable!
Eliminate all the negative inputs in your life! Stop listening to the depressing local news. Avoid those coworkers who are chronic complainers. Stop arguing with your significant other about the petty stuff. Stop dwelling on the flaws that we all have and you're certain to find if you're looking for them. Do the opposite! Listen to uplifting podcasts or television/radio shows. Start your day by visiting the IQ Morning report hosted by Jimmy Vaughn. Seek out the company of upbeat, enthusiastic people! Engage your significant other in a conversation centered around your appreciation for each other. Take notice of all the good qualities a person has and pay them a sincere compliment on those qualities!
Above all...LAUGH! Find the humour in things...especially yourself.
Life is too short to be unhappy. Don't sweat the small stuff...which 99% of it is! Rise above the clouds. The sun is always shining. Think about all the things in your life you undoubtedly have to be grateful for and find a way to elevate your spirits. You deserve happiness. We all do. Wholeheartedly.
You may not be a NBA fan...but chances are you still know who Kobe Bryant is. His celebrity status as the super star for the Las Angeles Lakers for the past 20 years has made him a household name in the United States, and it's probably safe to say across most of the globe.
This morning as I was watching the news I learned that Kobe played his last professional game of his stellar career last night. He scored 60 points in an incredible performance against the Utah Jazz in his career finale. It was fitting that he would end his career in such a way. His shots were dropping, he turned back the hands of time for a moment. and it was just a reminder of the many great performances he had throughout his long career. Not many athletes go out on such an inspired performance. Last night was an exceptional moment for Kobe and his fans. Kobe's passion was on display. Even if you're not a Kobe fan you cannot deny that he's one of the most competitive and passionate players whose ever played the game. Passion. How fortunate are those who develop a passion for something and develop it to the utmost of their capabilities? Or even better, those who recognize that they can live their lives with an intense desire and enthusiasm to be the best that they can be? Nelson Mandela was quoted as saying, "There is no passion to be found playing small...in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living." I love that quote. How often do we play small out of fear of failure, or the opinions of others? What would or could we accomplish if we acted as if it were impossible to fail? It takes a tremendous amount of resolve to stay the course when you've identified your passion. Often passion correlates with your purpose in life...the thing(s) that you've identified as being most important to your very existence, and that you derive the most satisfaction from. The things that you get fired up about when you allow your imagination to visit the possibilities that exist...when you dare to fantasize about the optimized YOU. And it's no small coincidence that your/our purpose is often tied to serving others in some regard. Some people's passion...and hence their purpose..is recognized at a young age. They hone it and develop it and master a life of remarkable achievements because of this. The athlete's and entertainers of the world come to mind when I consider this fact. But then, on the flip side, there are many of us who need to voyage through life...experience life and it's lessons to figure out what their passions and purpose is. That's ok. The only people I truly feel sorry for are the people who travel through life without giving it a thought as to what their purpose and passion is. Satisfied to trudge through their existence...this miracle that is life...without recognizing what they contribute to the universe. Failing to recognize that no matter what their role is in society they matter tremendously to someone. It was great waking up to the story of Kobe's finale game. Kobe Bryant's passion was on display one final time for us. Until the next time... #YouMatterTremendously #GoldenRuleLifeStrategy #LiveYourLifeWithPurpose
My boys are ages 17 and 14. Nick is my 17 years old and Kevin just turned 14. They mean the world to me of course. I try as much as I can...without being a complete drag...to let them know that everybody faces adversity, and that it's how we respond to adversity that ultimately defines who we are. In a nutshell my philosophy is you can either get bitter, or you can get better. Living and learning through adversity is the name of the game. Having gone through much adversity myself I'm fairly well qualified to speak upon such things to my sons, and to write upon the subject matter here. I always keep in mind, however, that what one person may perceive as difficulties or misfortune is what another may perceive as mere inconveniences. My mother, God bless her soul, taught me a lot on how to deal with adversity. It's really amazing how much we learn from watching our parents as we are growing up. My mom suffered a devastating stroke when she was in her early 40's and my sisters and I were teenagers. I was a freshman in high school. My mom and I were always very, very close and I remember being very scared that she was going to die. It was the first real health scare in our immediate family. She ended up being hospitalized for close to a year...she actually had more than one stroke and had some issues with blood clotting as well...so between her initial treatment and the ensuing physical, recreational and occupational therapies it made for a very long time away from home. As you can imagine, it was tough for her and us, her family. When she finally returned home her life was changed in a huge way from the stroke. She lost complete use of her left arm and hand. She also had to wear a brace and walked with a limp as her left leg was also affected. She was always a great stay at home Mom and homemaker and didn't have a lazy bone in her body. She cooked our meals, cleaned the house, did the laundry and often was outside working as well gardening and such. She was a tough cookie and a great Mom. Her tough Irish nature allowed her to deal with her adversity in a way that I will never forget, and has left an indelible impression on who I am today. She very well could have expected us to wait on her hand and foot...but that was not her nature. She resumed many of her household duties and did want much help with things...it was her way of proving...I am sure of this looking back...that she was far from being a figure to pity and to be viewed as weak. That was who she was. She continued being as active as possible until 20 years later when she was hit by another stroke which affected her eyesight and more cognitive functions. But always a smile. And a laugh. And a song upon her lips. A remarkable Mother I was blessed with to learn how to deal with the setbacks that can come...sometime through no fault of your own. Her upbeat disposition is...for the most part...something I inherited from her and that I am extremely grateful for. Many times over the years I have drawn upon her example as inspiration to keep a good attitude. I have my moments...we all do...when I feel less than strong. And it's in those moments that I think about her and course correct my thinking and attitude. I am positive that we ALL have these people in our families...and amongst our friends...who serve as a shining example on how living and learning through adversity gives us the strength and the wisdom to deal with our own unique challenges. We really need to be grateful for them and whenever possible let them know how much they are appreciated. Until the next time... #YouMatterTremendously #GoldenRuleLifeStrategy #LiveYourLifeWithPurpose
I can't really pin point the exact time and place it was but, about 18 months ago I stumbled upon the Success Hotline. I'm happy I did. It was a baby step that I desperately needed to jumpstart the personal development process again.
The Success Hotline is a phone number you can call...to listen to and contemplate...a motivational message recorded by Dr. Rob Gilbert. Dr. Rob Gilbert is a professor at Montclair State University and is an expert in the field of sports psychology, motivation, leardership cultivation. His messages are usually under 3 minutes, thought provoking, and entertaining.
The Success Hotline is daily, and as I type this he has recorded 9,212 of these messages. That type of committment and consistency is amazing. The number is 1 (973) 743-4690. Give it a call sometime and check it out for yourself.
As good as the Success Hotline is there is a newsletter/website that is even better. Dr. Gilbert spoke of it on the Success Hotline and well, since I enjoyed his Hotline so much I decided to venture over and give it the old cyber once over. Once again, happy I did!
The newsletter is the creation of a terrific man named Jimmy Vaughn. It's named the IQ Morning Report and it is chock full of invaluable, positive meme's, videos, articles and other resources designed to help you achieve your goals...however lofty they are. Jimmy opens up each newsletter with a summary of the days content and offers his own unique and accurate insight in a grandfatherly manner. You can't help but like the fella, and I have fell into the habit of calling The Success Hotline and subscribed to the IQ Morning Report daily. Jimmy Vaughn is a self described "student of success," and he is very quick to give recognition, credit and direction to the pioneers of the personal development industry, as well as the contemporary giants of today.
There is a huge body of work for us to draw upon...the wisdom you seek is already out there and great thinkers stand the test of time. Napolean Hill, W. Clement Stone, Earl Nightingale, Norman Vincent Peale, Og Mandino, Andrew Carnegie...their writings and teachings alone can enrich anybody's life and in fact the number of people whose lives have been enriched by these great thinkers number in the millions.
