The Rabbit Hole Of Modern Living

The Rabbit Hole That Is Facebook

"It time be of all things the most precious, wasting time must be the greatest prodigality."...Benjamin Franklin

I remember when I first joined Facebook. It was awesome being able to reconnect with old classmates and catch up.  It was like a cyber class reunion!  Within a few short weeks I caught up with literally dozens of childhood friends and others who I lost track with over the years.  It's a remarkable thing.  Instantly we were able to share pictures of our children and family and recall memorable stories and talk about sports and so much more.  Absolutely incredible.  But nobody warned me about the rabbit hole that is facebook!

I know you know what I'm talking about! Along with the ability to reminisce came all the other posts that suck you in...the politics, the funny animal videos, the news stories...and of course the 999 comments that go along with all these virals posts. You can get on Facebook, and if you're not time conscious and disciplined before you know it you're running late for work or school or any of a number of important things.  Not good.

I was reading an article not too long ago that said that many kids are getting sucked into the rabbit hole of modern living also. Many kids, because they can't even relate to a world without the technology that many of us saw the invention and advent of, find separating from their smart phones an anxiety filled situation. Personally I had to make sure my sons didn't have their phones in their rooms with them when it was time to hit the sack.  Between texting, Snapchat, Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, and other social media sites I'm not even in the know about, it can be a real problem! So yeah...the rule in the Kiussis household is no phones in the bedroom when it's time for bed.  Sleep is very important. 

Some of us, when we were kids, use to love reading.  That was our rabbit hole.  At night time we would use a flashlight to read a book under our covers if we were that engrossed.  I'm sure you remember that.  Good times.

Recently I deactivated my Facebook account.  Just too much noise and distraction.  Plus I missed reading books. So I made a concerted effort to begin reading again in whatever downtime I have.  I have to tell you it's been great! Seriously.  But it was not easy.  It took about three days before the urge to log into my Fb account and see what was happening in my newsfeed waned.  I think I even had a slight withdrawal from it lolol! Seriously. There's definitely an addiction component to it!

So now I will go forward with the strategy of jumping on at a set time, or set a time limit on how long I will stay on.  I'm still working it out.  The one thing I know, however, is that my love for books will never disappear, and I will never let the rabbit hole of modern living come between me and a good book ever again.  Not going to happen!  I'll keep you posted.

Until next time...
#YouMatterTremendously
#GoldenRuleLifeStrategy
#LiveYourLifeWithPurpose

Check out this video.  You'll find it very interesting if you've ever wondered why we are so attached to our technology.

  

          

How To Be More Productive

The Power Of The "To Do" List

"If we boost productivity, we can improve economic growth."...Tony Abbott

Without a doubt the very best way for you to become more productive and more efficient is to incorporate a daily "To Do" list. You hear a lot of talk concerning time management related to the discussion of productivity.  The reality is that you  cannot manage time.  We all have the same twenty four hours in a day to work with. It goes by at the same speed as everybody else's does.  What we can do...what we do have control over...is activity management.  And the power of the "To Do" list is THE time tested method for mastering activity management.  This is the first thing to master in learning how to be more productive.

Personally I prefer the old school method of pen and paper when creating my to do lists.  But in these modern times you have plenty of options.  You can create your daily "To Do" list on your phone or tablet, and yes there are even apps that you can check out if you're so inclined.  The choice is yours.  The important thing is using a method that you're going to stick with.

We can't trust our memory to get things done.  You'll disappoint yourself.  Believe me I've done it a thousand times.  Too many things pop up during the course of our day that compete for our attention, time, & energy.  Distractions galore!  Having a "To Do" list allows us to stay on course...to be organized...to have a game plan on how we are going to attack our day.  After utilizing a daily list for any stretch of time you'll find that you're getting things done.  And it's a great feeling checking things off of your "To Do" list!  It gives you a sense of accomplishment.

I personally like to create my "To Do" list towards the end of my day. Everybody has a different style and approach.  Some prefer to make theirs in the morning before they begin the day.  As you begin to utilize a "To Do" list with regularity, you will soon see that you can strategize your day better by giving certain "high importance" activities priority. 

It's also important to realize that you don't have to be a slave to your daily "To Do' List.  As a matter of fact it's best to just prioritize your list by the activities that create the most impact for you...the ones that "pack a punch"...if you will.  Many advocates of "To Do" lists only advocate putting a few, no more than three, high priority activities on your list.  Personally I feel that's for the individual to decide. Some have a lot more energy and less demands on them throughout the day than others.

At the end of the day it all boils down to the fact that "To Do" lists help you manage your activities better...in a more efficient manner. Properly utilized you'll create more time for yourself and be way less stressed out.  It helps you honor your committments and stay on top of things.  As we all know well focus is everything. Click here for an article that can give you more insight on the benefits of using a "To Do" list.  

Until next time...

#YouMatterTremendously

#GoldenRuleLifeStrategy
#LiveYourLifeWithPurpose

The Power Of Being An Optimist

As You Think So Shall It Be

"Optimism is essential to achievement and it is also the foundation of courage and true progress."...Nicholas M. Butler

Being an optimist gives you an undeniable edge in every facet of life. It's rooted in belief and faith, both in oneself and in the world in which we live.  The power of being an optimist is that when problems or setbacks occur, as they eventually will, you have the understanding that "this too shall pass" and can see past the momentary obstacles.  As you think so shall it be.

Our history books are filled with accounts of optimism.  Often there is a strong leader associated with these events whose unparalled optimism can give courage and hope to an entire nation of people. Winston's Churchill's leadership during World War 2 is a fantastic example of this.

Imagine a world without unyielding optimism.  Doesn't sound like a lot of fun does it?  I'm a big believer in the fact that optimism can be cultivated...even if you've been a total pesstimist your entire life. I would suggest trying to be more aware of your overall attitude. Whenever you catch yourself caving in to a pessimistic thought pattern try to replace it with an optimistic positive thought.  Mental "spin control" so to speak.  Give it a real go for a substantial amount of time because replacing ingrained thought patterns won't happen in a day or two.  But I can speak from experience that the more you practice maintaining a mindset of optimism and positivity, the easier it will become AND the better you will be for it.

Also...safeguard your optimism.  Recognize quickly the people who have a "woah is me" attitude and pessimistic out look on everything. Gravitate towards people who are upbeat and enthusiastic about their life.  People who exude a confident, positive, optimistic vibe. It's all about the Law of Attraction people!

Until the next time...

#YouMatterTremendously
#GoldenRuleLifeStrategy
#LiveYourLifeWithPurpose

Why The World Will Miss Prince

Prince Was Authentic

"All these non-singing, non-dancing, wish-I-had-me-some-clothes fools who tell me my albums suck.  Why should I pay attention to them?"...Prince

If you spent the better part of the Eighties in your teen years, like I did, then without question you know exactly what I mean when I say Prince was authentic.  An original.  One of a kind.  He exploded into national recognition with a visual and musical style that was unique and unapolegically his own. 

Sure the Eighties were characterized in general by a kind of excessive look...big hair, parachute pants, etc...and sure other huge stars like Madonna and Michael Jackson were also pretty wild looking and unique...but nobody...and I mean nobody...owned that persona more comepletely than Prince.

That's what, aside from his lyrical and instrumental genius, made him so successful in being able to have crossover fans like myself. Sure, I was mostly hard rock and heavy metal, but there was no denying the immeasurable talent and charisma that Prince had. What teenage boy who watched Purple Rain...the smash movie that really made him famous...couldn't relate to the angst that he suffered in regards to his music, his gorgeous girlfriend, and his relationship with his father.

His was a unique story.  A tremendous career and individual whose hallmark was just being himself.  The man, and his unlimited musical creativity, will be missed.  

There is something very special and powerful in finding...and then being...your most authentic self.  It seems that the people who are able to reconnect with that part of themselves are the happiest on Earth.  I say reconnect because I am of the opinion that most of us go wayward somewhere in young adulthood.  There is nothing more enviable to a grown up...trapped in the grind of a lifestyle that is killing them slowly...than the unadulterated freedom and self expression of a young person not yet robbed of their dreams.

What would your life look like if you had of never gave in to the conformity of working that 9-5 that you stumbled into, all because you wanted to please other people?  Isn't it possible that with a little more grit and determination...with a little more resiliency and a little less fear...you might have been able to tap into the true talents and abilities that you have within you?  Perhaps you are doing exactly what you wanted to be doing when you were a child.  If so congratulations because you are a successful person!  But if there is a passion that you have repressed...a talent or ability that you've been keeping within you...then chances are the world hasn't been exposed to the most authentic version of you that there is.  That's food for thought. 

RIP Prince...and thank you for your authentic brilliance.

Until next time...

#YouMatterTremendously

#GoldenRuleLifeStrategy
#LiveYourLifeWithPurpose

Clink here to see today's video and watch Prince rock 100,000 people and 1,000,000 total around the world.  He was totally in his element...the Purple Rain.    

Your Habits Make You Or Break You

We Are What We Repeatedly Do

"Excellence is an art won by training and habituation.  We do not act rightly because we have virtue or excellence, but we rather have those because we have acted rightly. We are what we repeatedly do.  Excellence. then is not an act but a habit."...Aristotle

There are two things that determine who we are and what type of life we live in life.  These two things are...drum roll please...the thoughts that we think and the habits that we have.  

Since we are cerebral life forms, there should be no doubt that the quality of our thinking, and what we are thinking about, are the Alpha and Omega of it all.  But once the thoughts are in place in our brain the next crucial step to these thoughts manifesting into anything real and tangible is action.  And ultimately our actions are rooted in the habits that we have.  The difference between good and bad habits make all the difference in the world in what we achieve and who we become because what the great Greek philosopher Aristotle said is 100% true..."We are what we repeatedly do." 

My two sons are wrestlers.  My oldest started much earlier than my youngest, and so going into high school he had a huge advantage in terms of what he learned since he began and the habits that he already established.  He won an Ohio Youth State Championship in sixth grade, a Jr. High State Championship in eight grade, and as of this writing, is a three time State Runner Up in three of the toughest weight classes in high school!  As you can imagine his Mom and I are extremely proud of him.  Google "Nick Kiussis wrestling" and check him out if you're a wrestling fan.  

My youngest son Kevin started later than Nick, and it took awhile for him to grow a true liking for the sport.  He started and stopped but is working hard in middle school and trying to develop the habits that are necessary in becoming a top performer.  We are very proud of him also.  It's one of the toughest sports in the world.

The point I'm trying to make, using them as an example, is that a lot of disciplined, hard work goes into becoming successful at anything in life.  They are in the habit of going to practises.  They are in the habit of strength training regularly.  They are in the habit of eating right...at least a fair amount of the time.  They are in the habit of going to bed to be properly rested.  You get the picture. These things are not easy for young boys and men in today's society.  These are good habits that they, and all their top fellow wrestlers, either have developed or are in the process of developing.

Dear old dad here fell out of the good habits of eating healthy and regularly working out.  I started being too casual about my food choices and going to the gym.  Eating too much and not going to the gym are bad habits!  And as a result I've got my work cut out for me to get back in shape.  No worries dear readers of this blog I'm on it! Reestablishing habits.  My point is that your habits make or break you in ALL areas of your life.  

One of the best things you can do on a regular basis is take a good hard look at the results you've been getting in your life.  Think carefully and deliberately about your habits and whether or not the habits that you currently practice are in line with your goals and the vision of who you want to ultimately become.  Perhaps you will identify a bad habit or two that, if replaced by a healthy more productive habit, could give you the push you need to take yourself to the next level.  This is an ongoing project...like life itself.  No need to beat yourself up about anything, but when it's time to regroup it's time to regroup!  

This is the essence of personal development.  Constantly learning how to become the best version of yourself.  Keeping a positive, growth oriented mindset and establishing habits that produce the actions to be congruent with that mindset.  On paper it might sound easy...but if it were then I wouldn't be here blogging about it.  All I know is that you're worth it and whatever it is you desire can be achieved.

Until the next time...

#YouMatterTremendously

#GoldenRuleLifeStrategy
#LiveYourLifeWithPurpose

        

Live For The Experience

This Isn't A Practice Run

"It is only in adventure that some people succeed in knowing themselves-in finding themselves."...Andre Gide

I'm just a few short months from turning fifty. The "Big Five O". And I would be less than honest if I said there wasn't a certain amount of apprehension associated with turning fifty.  I don't know if it's simply because I'll be qualified for the AARP or what.  All I know is turning forty didn't phase me in the slightest. But fifty will start you thinking.  After all, this isn't a practice run.

Perhaps it's because when I was much younger I thought I'd have a lot more things accomplished than what I have thus far. I mean at one point I wanted to be President.  That was in second through fourth grade.  And at a different point I wanted to be the lead singer of a rock band. That was probably 6th through 9th grade if my memory serves me right.  See you know you're getting up there when you start saying "if my memory serves me right".

All I know for sure is that no matter who we are, we all at some point are going to have to face our own mortality.  With both of my parents having passed away...as well as many of my other older relatives...I guess fifty is as good a point in my life as any to think about how I want the remainder of my life to play out.  Which I'll certainly do.  After all, with the miracles of modern science and the breakthroughs in the field of medicine being what they are, perhaps I'll be able to reach that glorified centurian status!

It's really important for us all to live for the experience.  "The experience of what" you might ask?  The experience of everything that can cross your mind and that isn't in conflict with your value system or harmful to anybody else.  There is so much to experience in this remarkable world that surrounds us.  I had a sociology professor who once said something that I've never forgotten.  He said "there are over 2,000 ways to be human."  Thank you Dr. Krebs.  Being a kid raised for the most part in suburban Cleveland that struck home with me. It fascinated me.  The fact that us humans can...and do...live in every type of environment, and that our cultures can differ so tremendously is just amazing to me. I know that travel is definitely going to be a big part of my bucket list.  

Life is short.  We should all strive to live the life of a brave explorer or adventurer.  Without a doubt life should be fun and exciting and we should wake up each and every morning with some type of compelling reason to attack our day.  And while we may not have the ideal job or circumstances to do Indiana Jones type things at this present moment, just the goal of being able to in our future should give us all the incentive we need to work hard to design the life we want.  Are there going to be setbacks along the way?Bumps in the road?  Heartache?  Bumps and bruises?  Yep.  You can count on that.  But never despair that they are things that you can't overcome.  Without question you can...and will.  And then you're back trying to live for the experiences that uniquely challenge and satisfy you! 

Perhaps life after fifty won't be so bad after all.  With the right attitude it could be the best years yet!  Wow.  Now I'm looking forward to it.  It's all a matter of perspective, isn't it?

Until the next time...

#YouMatterTremendously

#GoldenRuleLifeStrategy
#LiveYourLifeWithPurpose

Friendship

The Wonderful Gift That Is Friendship

"Walking with a friend in the dark is better than walking alone in the light."...Helen Keller

Humans are social beings.  We always have been and we always will be.  We thrive on interacting with each other; indeed our very survival as a species has been dependent upon this fact.  Our social groups are how we identify and relate to each other.  Outside of the family that we are born into, our friends play a pivotal role throughout the course of our lives, and have much to do with how we perceive and experience life.  

I have a few life long friends.  One of these fellows is Mike Mennozi. I've known Mike ever since kindergarten.  When you're 49 years old and you've had a friend since you were 5 years old...well...that's special.  People who have known you for your entire life know you in an entirely different way than somebody whose only known you for the past couple years.

That is not to say that Mike and I talk every single day...or that we have weekly visits.  We do see each other a few times a year still and make sure that we have a good conversation whenever one of us picks up the phone to call the other.  The conversation flows naturally, laughs ensue, and that is enough to sustain our deep rooted friendship.  I think all who have these types of long standing friendships should consider themselves fortunate.

Throughout the course of our lives, through shared experiences like school, college, the military, careers, etc...we meet people and bond with those who we have the most in comon with, who we find interesting, and who we admire and respect.  We should all "keep on the lookout", so to speak, for good quality people who we can develop friendships with.  One of my good friends, Jimmy Fields, is a terrific guy I met through both of our son's participation in the sport of wrestling.  At this point, because of our son's involvement in wrestling, we talk and see each other much more than my friendship with my childhood friend Mike, but that's not saying that one is more important than the other.  All friendships have their unique properties, and they do not have to parallel or be in competition with each other.

And then there is my best friend...my wife Pam.  Lucky are us men who would otherwise be set adrift to the currents of life if not achored down by the sensibilities of a good woman!  She is the greatest gift ever bestowed upon me and gave me two wonderful sons to focus my life's energies on...two equally great gifts who are sure to be my running mates in just a few more years.  One can hope!

In this day and age of Facebook and other social media friendships, when a persons "friends list" can number in the thousands, it is important to recognize, cultivate, and value the different types of friendships that we have.  Friendship can be the best therapy in the world for someone who is down in the dumps.  Friendships can encourage us to see the potentialities within ourselves that may be difficult, for whatever reason, for us to recognize.

Friendship truly is a wonderful gift and the following advice are things that I have both heard throughout my life and have found to be truth:

1. Pick your friends carefully.  You are judged by the company you keep.
2. "Wishing to be friends is quick work, but true friendship is a slow ripening fruit."...Aristotle
3. To have a friend you have to be a friend.

Until the next time...

#YouMatterTremendously
#GoldenRuleLifeStrategy
#LiveYourLifeWithPurpose

Here's the irrepressible Brendon Burchard. Terrific video on the subject of friendship.           

   

The Sun Is Shining Today

When The Sun Is Shining We Are Renewed

I'm an early bird.  I've been that way all my life, except for those die hard party years of my early twenties that took me well into the wee hours of the morning...mostly on the weekends.  Those years I pretty much partied like a rock star.  Misdirected, I thought that was what life was about...sex, drugs, and rock and roll...which means I would eventually stumble into my room, wherever I was living, and sleep until at least noon...if I had the day off.  There were plenty of days when I did indeed have to work on a Saturday, and well, those days were pretty rough to get through.  Other than that stretch of time I've always woke up early.  Just the way I'm biologically wired I guess.

I love waking up and watching the day unfold.  No matter the season, the one factor that almost always makes me feel great is when the sun makes it's appearance, announcing that it's a new day to planet Earth.  It's no wonder many of our early civilizations had religions that centered around sun worship!  When the sun is shining we are renewed in some way.  It just makes you feel great.

A bit of wisdom I ran across recently, which was made available through the always enthusiastic Darren Hardy in his newsletter, is that the sun is always shining, you just have to get above the clouds that may be blocking it's rays from reaching us.  He relayed a story about how he was leaving a business trip in Seattle; the weather was kind of overcast and gloomy, but soon after departure the plane's elevation was high enough that it was above the clouds and the sunlight was beautifully visible!

I thought it was a terrific analogy to symbolize the choice we can make on how we begin and spend our days.  No matter what is occurring in our lives, the irritations, the unpleasant people, the depressing local news stories, all those clouds so to speak...we can choose to rise up above them in the same way that a plane does to reach the sunshine.  The sun is shining today here in Cleveland Ohio...but in all actuality it's shining everyday above the clouds!

You do not have to let the weather, or nearly anything else dictate your moods.  Of course certain life events are sad.  The death of a loved one for instance, or the loss of a job.  Those are times when it's reasonable to feel depressed, angry, and all the other human emotions that accompany life events of that magnitude.  But to live each and every day in a funk is not healthy, nor is it acceptable!  

Eliminate all the negative inputs in your life!  Stop listening to the depressing local news.  Avoid those coworkers who are chronic complainers.  Stop arguing with your significant other about the petty stuff.  Stop dwelling on the flaws that we all have and you're certain to find if you're looking for them.  Do the opposite!  Listen to uplifting podcasts or television/radio shows.  Start your day by visiting the IQ Morning report hosted by Jimmy Vaughn.  Seek out the company of upbeat, enthusiastic people!  Engage your significant other in a conversation centered around your appreciation for each other.  Take notice of all the good qualities a person has and pay them a sincere compliment on those qualities!  

Above all...LAUGH!  Find the humour in things...especially yourself.

Life is too short to be unhappy.  Don't sweat the small stuff...which 99% of it is!  Rise above the clouds.  The sun is always shining. Think about all the things in your life you undoubtedly have to be grateful for and find a way to elevate your spirits.  You deserve happiness. We all do. Wholeheartedly.

Until the next time...

#YouMatterTremendously

#GoldenRuleLifeStrategy
#LiveYourLifeWithPurpose       

Kobe Bryant's Passion

KOBE'S PASSION WAS ON DISPLAY

You may not be a NBA fan...but chances are you still know who Kobe Bryant is.  His celebrity status as the super star for the Las Angeles Lakers for the past 20 years has made him a household name in the United States, and it's probably safe to say across most of the globe.

This morning as I was watching the news I learned that Kobe played his last professional game of his stellar career last night.  He scored 60 points in an incredible performance against the Utah Jazz in his career finale.  It was fitting that he would end his career in such a way.  His shots were dropping, he turned back the hands of time for a moment. and it was just a reminder of the many great performances he had throughout his long career.  Not many athletes go out on such an inspired performance.  Last night was an exceptional moment for Kobe and his fans.  Kobe's passion was on display.  Even if you're not a Kobe fan you cannot deny that he's one of the most competitive and passionate players whose ever played the game.

Passion.  How fortunate are those who develop a passion for something and develop it to the utmost of their capabilities?  Or even better, those who recognize that they can live their lives with an intense desire and enthusiasm to be the best that they can be?  

Nelson Mandela was quoted as saying, "There is no passion to be found playing small...in settling for a life that is less than the one you are capable of living."  I love that quote.  How often do we play small out of fear of failure, or the opinions of others?  What would or could we accomplish if we acted as if it were impossible to fail? 

It takes a tremendous amount of resolve to stay the course when you've identified your passion.  Often passion correlates with your purpose in life...the thing(s) that you've identified as being most important to your very existence, and that you derive the most satisfaction from.  The things that you get fired up about when you allow your imagination to visit the possibilities that exist...when you dare to fantasize about the optimized YOU.  And it's no small coincidence that your/our purpose is often tied to serving others in some regard.  

Some people's passion...and hence their purpose..is recognized at a young age.  They hone it and develop it and master a life of remarkable achievements because of this.  The athlete's and entertainers of the world come to mind when I consider this fact. But then, on the flip side, there are many of us who need to voyage through life...experience life and it's lessons to figure out what their passions and purpose is.  That's ok.  The only people I truly feel sorry for are the people who travel through life without giving it a thought as to what their purpose and passion is.  Satisfied to trudge through their existence...this miracle that is life...without recognizing what they contribute to the universe.  Failing to recognize that no matter what their role is in society they matter tremendously to someone.

It was great waking up to the story of Kobe's finale game.  Kobe Bryant's passion was on display one final time for us.

Until the next time...

#YouMatterTremendously
#GoldenRuleLifeStrategy
#LiveYourLifeWithPurpose

Education For The Misdirected

TURNING IT AROUND FOR THE BETTER

"If someone is going down the wrong road, he doesn't need motivation to speed him up.  What he needs is education to turn him around." ... Jim Rohn

A good formal education is what we all want for ourselves and our children and for the most part...at least here in the United States...it's within reach to practically everybody.  However a formal education is not what I'm really talking about in this post. What I'm talking about is the type of education that allows people who may have taken the wrong path early in life and became misdirected...and who desperately need lessons for turning it around for the better.  Or the people who didn't necessarily go down the wrong path, but simply weren't exposed to the values, thought processes, and life philosophies that lead to consistent success and life fulfillment.

At some point in our lives, no matter how difficult or troublesome our beginning was, we all have to have accountability and take responsibility for the decisions that we make.  For our choices, our actions. and the consequences that result from them.  The beginning chapters of any good book are usually very different from the chapters in the end.  Such it is with life.  We can edit our life's story at any point...if the will to do so is great enough.

I'm a huge believer in self education.  I strongly believe that success leaves clues, and that once we've endured enough pain and discomfort we can seek out a better way to live life.  This is what personal development is all about.  It's taking stock of your own value system...having the courage to do an honest self inventory and say "Hey up until this point I've fallen short.  I'm not happy with some of the results I've gotten through my decision making and I know I can do better.  I know the type of person I'm capable of being and I'm not going to be satisfied with anything less from here on out!"

There's a lot of power in that.  And we are neither alone in this struggle nor have a shortage of people to reach out to in order to help make these types of substantial changes happen.  On an everyday basis teachers, coaches, authors, social workers, counselors, doctors, employers, religious leaders and countless others serve in this capacity.  And by all means, and I need to stress this, a person doesn't need to have a title or a degree in front of or behind their name to do this.  It can be an extended family member, a neighbor, or even a friend who can make a huge difference.     

But it, the process, has to start from within.  The desire for change has to come from within.

Earl Nightingale, the "Dean of Personal Development", always referenced the six powerful words that he and countless others say changed their lives upon reading Napolean Hill's timeless classic "Think and Grow Rich".  Truer words have never been written or spoken.  "We are what we think about."  People need to be educated about trust, character, integrity, responsibility, accountability, compassion, participation...the types of things that there really are no "classes" for...but which are taught by the caring members of our society on an everyday basis.  Given the right example, the right people to follow and the right books to read, people can begin to replace the garbage they accepted as just "the way things are" with "the way things can be." 

People can reinvent themselves.  They don't have to be a slave to their upbringing or the life philosophy that has resulted in a less than satisfying life.  They need to be educated about the values. morals, and disciplines, that result in a life much different and much more fulfilling than the one they are choosing to live.  They need to understand...and feel...that they have free will to change what needs to be changed, and most importantly that they have the strength and courage within themselves to make it happen.

Until the next time...

#YouMatterTremendously

#GoldenRuleLifeStrategy
#LiveYourLifeWithPurpose

Grow From Your Adversity

LIVING AND LEARNING THROUGH ADVERSITY 

My boys are ages 17 and 14.  Nick is my 17 years old and Kevin just turned 14.  They mean the world to me of course. I try as much as I can...without being a complete drag...to let them know that everybody faces adversity, and that it's how we respond to adversity that ultimately defines who we are.  In a nutshell my philosophy is you can either get bitter, or you can get better.  Living and learning through adversity is the name of the game.

Having gone through much adversity myself I'm fairly well qualified to speak upon such things to my sons, and to write upon the subject matter here.  I always keep in mind, however, that what one person may perceive as difficulties or misfortune is what another may perceive as mere inconveniences.

My mother, God bless her soul, taught me a lot on how to deal with adversity.  It's really amazing how much we learn from watching our parents as we are growing up.  My mom suffered a devastating stroke when she was in her early 40's and my sisters and I were teenagers.  I was a freshman in high school.  My mom and I were always very, very close and I remember being very scared that she was going to die.  It was the first real health scare in our immediate family.

She ended up being hospitalized for close to a year...she actually had more than one stroke and had some issues with blood clotting as well...so between her initial treatment and the ensuing physical, recreational and occupational therapies it made for a very long time away from home.  As you can imagine, it was tough for her and us, her family.  When she finally returned home her life was changed in a huge way from the stroke.  She lost complete use of her left arm and hand.  She also had to wear a brace and walked with a limp as her left leg was also affected.  She was always a great stay at home Mom and homemaker and didn't have a lazy bone in her body.  She cooked our meals, cleaned the house, did the laundry and often was outside working as well gardening and such.  She was a tough cookie and a great Mom.

Her tough Irish nature allowed her to deal with her adversity in a way that I will never forget, and has left an indelible impression on who I am today.  She very well could have expected us to wait on her hand and foot...but that was not her nature.  She resumed many of her household duties and did want much help with things...it was her way of proving...I am sure of this looking back...that she was far from being a figure to pity and to be viewed as weak.  That was who she was.  She continued being as active as possible until 20 years later when she was hit by another stroke which affected her eyesight and more cognitive functions.

But always a smile.  And a laugh.  And a song upon her lips.  A remarkable Mother I was blessed with to learn how to deal with the setbacks that can come...sometime through no fault of your own.  Her upbeat disposition is...for the most part...something I inherited from her and that I am extremely grateful for.  Many times over the years I have drawn upon her example as inspiration to keep a good attitude.  I have my moments...we all do...when I feel less than strong.  And it's in those moments that I think about her and course correct my thinking and attitude.

I am positive that we ALL have these people in our families...and amongst our friends...who serve as a shining example on how living and learning through adversity gives us the strength and the wisdom to deal with our own unique challenges.  We really need to be grateful for them and whenever possible let them know how much they are appreciated.  

Until the next time...

#YouMatterTremendously
#GoldenRuleLifeStrategy
#LiveYourLifeWithPurpose

The Wisdom You Seek Is Already Out There.

GREAT THINKERS STAND THE TEST OF TIME

I can't really pin point the exact time and place it was but, about 18 months ago I stumbled upon the Success Hotline.  I'm happy I did. It was a baby step that I desperately needed to jumpstart the personal development process again. 

The Success Hotline is a phone number you can call...to listen to and contemplate...a motivational message recorded by Dr. Rob Gilbert. Dr. Rob Gilbert is a professor at Montclair State University and is an expert in the field of sports psychology, motivation, leardership cultivation.  His messages are usually under 3 minutes, thought provoking, and entertaining.  

The Success Hotline is daily, and as I type this he has recorded 9,212 of these messages.  That type of committment and consistency is amazing.  The number is 1 (973) 743-4690.  Give it a call sometime and check it out for yourself.

As good as the Success Hotline is there is a newsletter/website that is even better.  Dr. Gilbert spoke of it on the Success Hotline and well, since I enjoyed his Hotline so much I decided to venture over and give it the old cyber once over.  Once again, happy I did!

The newsletter is the creation of a terrific man named Jimmy Vaughn.  It's named the IQ Morning Report and it is chock full of invaluable, positive meme's, videos, articles and other resources designed to help you achieve your goals...however lofty they are. Jimmy opens up each newsletter with a summary of the days content and offers his own unique and accurate insight in a grandfatherly manner.  You can't help but like the fella, and I have fell into the habit of calling The Success Hotline and subscribed to the IQ Morning Report daily.  Jimmy Vaughn is a self described "student of success," and he is very quick to give recognition, credit and direction to the pioneers of the personal development industry, as well as the contemporary giants of today.  

There is a huge body of work for us to draw upon...the wisdom you seek is already out there and great thinkers stand the test of time. Napolean Hill, W. Clement Stone, Earl Nightingale, Norman Vincent Peale, Og Mandino, Andrew Carnegie...their writings and teachings alone can enrich anybody's life and in fact the number of people whose lives have been enriched by these great thinkers number in the millions.

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Until the next time...

#YouMatterTremendously

#GoldenRuleLife Strategy
#LiveYourLifeWithPurpose

It's The Start That Stops Most People

Use Baby Steps If You Have To

Sometimes...often as a matter of fact...it's the start that stops most people.  By the way "It's the start that stops most people" is a quote that, from my internet research, is attributed to Don Shula the great former coach of the Miami Dolphins.  I fell in love with that quote the first time I heard it.  Awesome wisdom in that.

There are many many reasons why we don't begin the things we should really do.  Most of them really are not "reasons" per se, but excuses.  And although I don't know the originator of this next quote, it's another great one: "Excuses are the nails used to build a house of failure."  We use the excuses "I don't have enough time" or "I'm too tired at the end of the day" or "I don't have enough money" or "I'm too old" to justify why we don't get started doing the things that we need to do to improve our lives.

This blog is a perfect example of that.  As it turns out it wasn't really that hard to start this blog.  It's just a matter of sitting down and doing it.  Discipline.  Let's face reality here.  If something is important enough to you, you'll find a way to carve out the time to make it happen. You know it and I know it.

Another reason we tend to procrastinate is that our belief system is in need of an overall.  Some of the things we put off can be downright daunting in nature.  A real challenge that's going to require some elbow grease to make it happen.  Things like losing a considerable amount of weight to improve your health, well being, or appearance.  Or making a job or career change because you have zero satisfaction from what it is you do.  Or ending an abusive relationship that you've been in for entirely too long.  

Things of this nature require you to be strong.  You have to absolutely dig deep and make the commitment to begin and then see it through.  You need to BELIEVE IN YOURSELF! And I know that may not be the easiest of things to do.  Trust me when I say this.  But working on yourself is never squandered time, and there are people out there who want you to succeed and who even believe in you when you are finding it hard to believe in yourself!

Take baby steps if you need to.  If you need to lose weight change an eating habit.  Just one positive change to get you started.  Take a walk around the block.  Just a small change.  You don't have to completely revamp your life to initiate a change...but hey if you can do that all the more power to you.

The point is...just begin.  From there your confidence and belief will develop.  But you have to begin.  You can do it.  I BELIEVE YOU CAN. 

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#YouMatterTremendously
#GoldenRuleLifeStrategy
#LiveYourLifeWithPurpose